Mama needs a new pair of shoes!

I hate the Jared commercials: "He went to Jared!" Ya-di-fricken-hoo. Do you have to say it a thousand times in one commercial?????

This has bothered me for years. Why is it that poetry, when translated from another language into English, still rhymes? What's up with that? Isn't it amazing that all the poets know the words that will translate into rhyming words??? This happens with songs, too. Why? Why?

That song they play at Christmastime that goes something like, "Please, mister, my momma's dying and she needs some new shoes and all I brought were pennies even though I'm smart enough to examine her shoes and know what styles she likes and that these will make her smile." First of all, it's a giant dollop of Cheez Whiz. Puh-leese. Second, what small boy knows his mother's shoe size? What small boy realizes that his mother makes Christmas nice and special? And why is this kid all dirty? Where's the dad? Why isn't anyone bathing this child? My theory is that this little boy is part of a mother/son con artist team and his mother is waiting outside the door to the shop and told him to go in and get some size 8 Manolo Blahniks. The kid knew the guy behind him was a class-A sucker and would pony up for the shoes because he was wearing a sappy grin and a cowboy hat. Hence - Momma's got a new pair of shoes! Despite my theory, which I know is correct, I still can't stand to listen to this song.

Those are my pet peeves for today. :)