Tuesday, March 12, 2013

Imogen says...

Imogen is the daughter of my friend Lynn in England, and she says the funniest things. Here are some Imogen stories:

Imogen had to make another shoe box habitat this weekend.  I suggested she re-use her Dubai desert and make a sea scape as she can make rainbow loom fish.

The suggestion was frowned upon as re-using her old model is copying and she might get into trouble for copying (can you copy from yourself?).

She came up with a solution herself and labelled the box "Imogen Hall's coral reef recycled from her Dubai desert because we are an ECO school".

Firstly she sneaked into the kitchen and drank Daniels coke. Apparently she had to have it as she had heartburn. She could tell she had heartburn as she could feel her heart starting to beat really fast and when she bent her nose to her chest could smell the burning!!  The coke was needed it cooled her heart down. She's adamant she even heard a sizzle as she drank it.

And she wouldn't get ready for bed, clean her teeth, tidy her stuff... When asked. I told her if she can't manage to tidy her things then she must have too many things to cope with so why don't we sort out a bag for the charity shop. She can manage her things its just that she didn't know I was talking to her because I was saying Imogen and her name is Safrina!!!!

Imogen's latest thing is she refuses to accept the existence of Bulgaria.

She says its a stupid name and obviously made up so she won't be using it.

She's very kindly (after being told she can't insist if they're too stupid to give their country a proper name then they're too stupid to live there) said the Bulgarians can remain but they really must try harder.   She sees nothing wrong with Hungary or Turkey it's just poor Bulgaria that was the focus of the way-home-rant.


Imogen, "I'm going to be good for as long as I can. I think I can last for over a second".

And how could I have forgotten. Imogen wrote me a mothers day poem

"Mums are so nice
They let you cook rice
When you're in a struggle
They give you a cuddle
And they take out your lice"

The wedding was very nice.  Both children were well behaved.  Elliot made a friend of the bridesmaid and hardly left her side.  Imogen collected tiny glass beads from the tables and sold them to the male guests as magic beans (she made about £7).  My cousin Scot got a clout from his partner for telling Imogen "If you've got magic beans I've got a cow!"

Imogen has decided to give up something for Lent. She is giving up bouncing balls whilst jumping rope.  Did try and explain you are meant to give up something that is a sacrifice (I may give up sloth) but Imogen can't see the point of that.  She would rather give up something she does not do anyway.  Her other suggestion was giving up eating chocolate in the middle of the night on Tuesdays.

Did I tell you the saga of the boots?  Imogen's school shoes split and were no longer waterproof so I bought her a pair of black Ugg type boots.  She took an immediate dislike and decided they were far too small.  If you can imagine how someone might walk with every bone in each foot broken then that is how she walked in the boots.  Next morning it was snowing and madam was adamant she is wearing the leaky shoes.  She did not even get to the pavement when her feet got cold and she insisted to come back for the boots.  I said something along the lines of the boots not being too small the day before.

"Yes they were too small but I got a papercut on my finger and lost some blood which made my feet shrink so now the boots fit but they were too small before I lost some blood"!

After many tantrums Imogen finally chose (pink shoes with white flowers and sparklies) to go with her dress. My idea of a good price to pay was around the £15 mark.  Imogen was adamant Paul and Clarissa don't really need wedding money and will get more happiness from knowing Imogen has high heeled sparkly shoes with actual diamonds.  

Luckily the day was saved by Sarai who sent her some princess badges and a gemstone shaped pink glass.  (And some sweets which have been hidden away).  Imogen could not possibly have been more delighted.  At bedtime she said, "mum I love you"

"That's nice I love you too"

"Yes I love you more than chocolate milk but only about a half as much as I love my new actual pink diamond.  It's very precious"


From Lynn:

It kept her busy most of this afternoon. Parents aren't allowed to correct grammar or spellings as it interrupts the creative flow.

Written and spelled as she did.

From Imogen
Where the willd things are?  Book for mis chleven.

One day max was whereing his woolf soot and gross and he was sent to his womm not to drinck or eat and he said I wile eat you Max said no!

Anoler one door said max was criyen max chasthed dog with a fork

Look max were gross said maxis mummy

Then he went to sea the wild things to visit

(he sailed there in a rowing boat with a tree in it.  There's a picture of max with a speech bubble "pleas can I have a cherry thank you" and a cat replying "yes")

And they had some oringe jus they said  coffie max said fank you

Then max went home to have a niss rast

So max was in his bed be a good boy betent max are a clock.

Today max it was his birthday he was 8 tees old he said thank you


The end
Goovie book
Well done Imogen.

(it was originally written for me but I made her tidy her dolls so my name was crossed out and the book was for miss treleven)

[as read to me:

One day max was wearing his wolf suit and he was cross.  He was sent to his room and had nothing to drink or eat.

"No" said Max, "I will eat you up!"

Another one at the door was crying and said Max chased his dog with a fork.

"Look Max we are cross" said Max's mummy.

Then max went to see the wild things to visit and they had said, "coffee"

"orange juice" Max said, "thank you"

Then he went home to have a nice rest and max was in his bed being a good boy and pretending to be a clock.

Today it was max's birthday he was 8 years old.  He said, "Thank you"

The wild things said, "hurray"

The end!

Groovy book.

Don't ask me about the pretending to be a clock the only explanation I could get was, "A face clock mum!"

Ah right.  That explains things?

Imogen has been asking why she can't sleep with the main light on and promising "I won't read my books or play".  Yeah right!  I told her last night that she needs the dark or her body won't make melatonin (it was after 11 and madam was angling to watch the wiggles as dancing might make her sleepy).  I told her melatonin tells your body it's time to sleep and it's time to heal or grow.  Lights out madam asleep in five minutes.

Tonight I'd put them to bed and was just doing the dishes when Imogen yells out, "mum turn that light out now my melon toners don't like it!".  She will be angling for a blackout blind next.

Imogen had her first haircut on Saturday.  She walked over to the chair and told the man what she wanted herself.  I'd already said if she asks for anything other than a trim to ignore her.  Imogen really loves the pink wig sarai sent and had been wishing her hair was pink!

I was getting my hair trimmed in the seat next to Imogen.  When the haircut was finished she told the hairdresser that it was very nice and if he likes he can be one of her best friends because she loves him.

She got a photo of her and Santa on a fridge magnet and a "Fimbles" puppet book.  Imogen was all set to march back to Santa with the book as "Fimbles are for babies and Santa didn't listen because I told him I like barbie".  She spent most of the weekend putting on plays though so she soon got over the disappointment of the gift not being a barbie.

A duck touched imogens finger with it's beak when she was feeding it.  Okay that's the facts over with.  Imogen asked me to tell you that a duck tried to eat her and it really hurt when she got home so she couldn't tidy up her toys.  It hurt a little when she was playing in the park immediately after the duck tried to eat her but imogen was being brave so she ignored the pain and carried on playing.  What a trooper.

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