Monday, February 21, 2011

The Conqueror conquers another heart

Kevin and I watched the most amazing movie this weekend. Truly a classic, it has quickly become one of my all-time favorites. The movie? The Conqueror, starring John Wayne as... wait for it... Genghis Khan, and Susan Hayward as his Tartar bride.

The make-up! Never have I seen so convincing a turning of a white man into an Asian. The costumes! Authentic to the thread! I didn't know they had pink chiffon and sequins in Mongolia.

But the eye is not the only sensory organ so stimulated by this epic. The ears are joyously fulfilled by the smooth handling of the script. The lines simply roll from John Wayne's tongue like ... like... gumballs from a gumball machine, if the gumball machine had some sort of defect in construction. (I was never good with similies.)

And the script - those writers must have been awfully proud. I imagine they wrote home to their mothers as soon as the ink was dry on the page.

Need I mention the acting, with such big names as John Wayne, Susan Hayward, and Agnes Moorhead? If you thought John Wayne was good as a cowboy, you should see him portraying a Mongolian warrior cowboy - I mean, a Mongolian warrior! And Susan hayward as the Tartar princess - simply ravishing in all those white, glittery evening gowns, and the range of emotion expressed in her delicate features is simply spellbinding. (Honey, I think she's angry... or constipated... or in love? I can't tell, what do you think?)

If you have never seen this movie, you really must go rent it. Your life will be empty and meaningless unless you do!

1 comment:

SidneyKay said...

Yes, this movie is on the list of worst movies, along with Troll, Myra Breckenridge, Glen/Glenda and Howard the Duck...none of those had John Wayne in them, I think